Quote of the day: Camilla Vs Pussycat Dolls

Which would you prefer? Camilla or the Pussycat Dolls?

Graham Norton during rehearsals for the Royal Variety Show, which will be attended by Prince Charles and his wife, Camilla: “And there you have the Pussycat Dolls singing to the Prince, ‘Don’t cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?’.”

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Prince Charles caught on pheasant shoot

Pictured: Prince Charles is caught red handed on bird shoot.

Prince Charles was caught by paparazzi shooting pheasants on the Queen’s Sandringham estate. The prince who tries to maintain a green image, who usually avoids being photographed actually shooting birds, was visibly annoyed at being caught shooting the pheasants out of the sky.

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British royals attend Remembrance Day service

Pictured: The Queen lays a wreath at the Cenotaph.

Picture courtesy of Belga.

The Queen, accompanied by senior members of the British royal families including the Duke of Edinburgh and Princes Charles and William, led tributes to Britain’s war dead this Remembrance Day at the Cenotaph in London’s Whitehall. The royals were joined by thousands of veteran servicemen who marched past the Cenotaph, as the Queen laid the first poppy wreath to commemorate all of those who gave their lives fighting for their country.
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The Oriental 'Royal' Express: Camilla & Prince Charles in Japan

You want one to wear this much makeup? What on earth for?
Picture courtesy of Abaca Press.

Prince Charles & the Duchess of Cornwall have kicked off their tour of Japan by visiting the Miraikan Museum of Emerging Science and Innovation and the Keio University.

Whilst Charles watched a dancing robot, the locals were obviously giving Camilla a few hints on covering up her face.

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Those appalling waxworks Prince Charles & Camilla, tour Japan

Charles & Camilla are clearly thrilled to be in Japan.
Picture courtesy of Getty Images.

Charles & Camilla have jetted to Japan for a 5 day tour. Greeted at the Tokyo International Airport by Charles' Japanese counterpart, Crown Prince Naruhito, the British royal couple looked less than impressed.

Princess Diana in Japan.
Picture courtesy of Getty Images.

Perhaps they were a little jetlagged? Or perhaps Charles is remembering his 1986 tour of Japan with then wife, Diana the Princess of Wales. The late Princess was a sensation and became a huge hit with the Japanese people, who still remember her with great fondness.

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Charles & Camilla: Childish old twits?

'Jovial' tin: eh...

Picture courtesy of The Sun.

It was Christmas time 1977 and Charles and Camilla were obviously bored. So bored that they graffitied all over a chocolate box with crude jokes and the like. Perhaps there were bored because Camilla was heavily pregnant with daughter Laura at the time.

The pair drew such things as a pile of manure and writing "two old poofs" in reference to the 2 gentlemen pictured on the tin.

In 1 scribble, Camilla has signed her name 'Camilla Parker Bowles' from which a line is drawn to the words 'Silly old horse'. Very apt don't you think?

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Quote of the day....

Sphincter says whaa...

Sue Carroll, Daily Mirror - 14/10/08: 'Prince Charles has reportedly turned down an offer to play a cameo role in Doctor Who. Why? You'd have thought saving the Galaxy and possibly the entire Universe would have made a welcome change for HRH from trying to rescue a mere planet.'

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Prince Charles proves he's a funsucker

A Chalek: Charles in the role of "King of the Daleks"

Prince Charles has turned down the chance to have a cameo appearence on Doctor Who. The television series writer and executive producer, Russell T Davies told an audience that he had written to the the Prince Of Wails inviting him on the show. Instead he was turned down.

Clarence House tried to playdown the Princes funsucking ways by telling the Daily Mail: "A letter was sent into the Prince of Wales' office and was dealt with on his behalf. We receive many request and it's impossible to accept them all."

Not impressed, Russell T Davies said: "He turned us down, the miserable swine."

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Charles gets a big Rod for his 60th Birthday

Is that a birthday present in your pants

or are you just happy to see Charles?

70's rocker Rod Stewart will perform for Prince Charles at his private 60th birthday party at Highgrove. Rod, who usually charges £1million for a private performance, is doing the gig for free because Charles is an old friend.

A Clarence House spokesman told the Daily Express: "The main musical entertainment at the party will be provided by Rod Stewart, who is an ambassador for the Prince’s Trust. He is giving his performance as a birthday present to the Prince.”

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Royal joke of the day...

Prince Charles & his untrusty steed.

Cartoon Courtesy of The Daily Mail.

Graham Norton, The Graham Norton Show, BBC2 used such phrases as: "Camilla looks like a man in a dress" & "She wants to run in the Grand National."

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It ain't half hot south of the equator ma'am!

Ouch! It's hot..poor me!

Camilla, the Duchess of Cornwall (husband thief extraordinaire), will return 4 days earlier than Charles from their tour of East Asia. Both Camilla and Charles were due to fly to Japan, Brunei and Indonesia in late October but it seems Camilla's a bit delicate when it comes to the heat in such tropical climates.

Forgetting the fact that she has endured such high temperatures during her many luxury cruises abroad and that she has just seen the end of the British summer, it seems that the trip to Asia will be far 'too arduous' for the 61 year-old.

The Daily Mail quoted Graham Smith, of anti-monarchist group Republic: 'If Camilla wants to enjoy the taxpayer funded perks of being a member of the Royal Family she needs to pull her weight.'

Both the Queen, 82 year-old and Prince Philip, 87 year-old, do double the public engagements each year than Camilla, who is over 20 years their junior.

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Prince Harry pays tribute to his godfather

Camilla, Harry & Charles at Gerald Ward's funeral.

Picture courtesy of the Daily Express Weekend.

Prince Harry has attended the funeral for his godfather and good friend to Prince Charles, Gerald Ward. The 70 year-old died after suffering a heartattack whilst playing golf. Harry and Camilla's son, Tom, acted as ushers during the service.

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Prince Charles' 60th Birthdaysssssssss

Charles' 2 great loves: Camilla and Michael Fawcett.

Unless you're that crazy Cat Lady from New York, you only ever celebrate each birthday once. But that sort of logic seems to have been lost on those organising the 60th birthday celebrations for Prince Charles.

Both Camilla and and the eternally present, Michael Fawcett are said to be busy preparing parties for Charles' special day. The first is a state banquet type affair at Buckingham Palace for over 170 invited guests from the Prime Minister to the Queen. This bash is being organised by the Fence Fawcett, reknown for his extravagant do's. The second party will be held at Highgrove by Camilla, this time approximately 75 guests will attend, including Kate Middleton and Chelsy Davy (still unconfirmed).

The dual celebrations have been slammed from all quarters for being indulgent, overtly extravagant and very unnecessary during the current financial crisis sweeping the UK.

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Prince Harry gets a dirty dancer

Dirty dancing for Haz.

Prince Charles has been accused many times of being a distant and uncaring father but it seems he's trying to make up for past poor parenting by giving Harry a great birthday gift. Over the weekend Charles met international reknown burlesque dancer Dita Von Teese whilst attending the Cartier International Polo event. Charles was quick to spot the saucy dancer and soon striked up a conversation.

The Daily Star reports: 'Charmed by her alabaster assets, Charles asked what she did for a living. And Dita, 35, replied: "I'm a dancer." This vague job description failed to convey that her act involves giving a rhythmic biology lesson in a giant martini glass and doing the sort of things to a massive olive which are illegal in most countries.'

Clearly not understanding what type of "dancing" Ms Von Teese does, Charles promptly invited her to dance for Harry at his upcoming 24th birthday. Looks like Harry will be a very lucky boy in September.

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Kate Middleton gets her CV plumped up

Kate Middleton? Ambitious? A job?

As calls for her to find more fulfilling employment grow, Kate Middleton's CV has been examined by 3 headhunters and the news is mediocre at best.

The Daily Mail did mock ups of CV's for Kate Middleton, Princes Wills, Harry, Edward and Charles, Camilla and Chelsy, changed their identities and passed them onto 3 (supposedly) unsuspecting headhunters for perusal. The headhunters were clearly unimpressed with all Cv's apart from Wills and Harry's. Arguably, the most interesting given the amount of grief she's been getting for not having a job, is Kate Middleton's mock CV.

Kate's CV included the personal statement: 'My future grandmother-in-law is keen for me to return to full-time employment. This does not concern me, however - I am ambitious, want to get to the very top, and believe I have a lot to offer any employer. I have first-hand experience of the media and have become accustomed to performing in front of reporters, photographers and TV crews, making me well able to represent an organisation in public.' It also includes previous employment that is shamefully small and quite incorrect: 'Accessories Buyer for a fashion company (2005-7); Professional photographer (2007-8)'

The fact that even the Daily Mail can't print the realistic timeframe of Kate's working life at Jigsaw is laughable to say the least. Far from beginning her employment there in 2005 (as the Daily Mail states) Kate started working at the fashion chain in November 2006. Kate spent 18 months post-uni doing nothing, with the empty stories of her concentrating on a children's line that never materialised. It was only after some scrutiny from royal fans and a few negative articles in the press started to appear (and perhaps a few freebies from Belle Robinson) that Middleton finally succumbed to the calls for her to do "something". Hence the role with Jigsaw.

The end result of this plumped up Kate-CV was the 3 headhunters Theo Paphitis, Nick Keeley and Tara Daynes opinions on what careers best suited the idle Middleton. Theo Paphitis concluded: "This is a young lady who wants to get married and have babies. Nothing wrong with that - but until then she needs discipline, a job where she has to take responsibility, instead of all this endless drifting. She would be brilliant on the fund-raising circuit. At the moment she's just killing time."

Nick Keeley took a different approach: "This is a driven and determined, creative and energetic young woman. She needs to focus on her own needs rather than giving in to family pressure, which can only end in tears. I would advise her to start her own photographic business, or perhaps even join the ranks of the paparazzi. She could earn thousands if she gets the right pictures. She shows enough commercial awareness to be a big success."

Tara Daynes said: "Caroline [Kate] should move into the advertising, marketing or media industry. Perhaps rather lacking in discipline, she has taken a rather scattergun approach to her career so far and needs to prove herself in the workplace. She needs to focus on learning some real skills."

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Prince Charles takes over Queen's polo day

Prince Charles after a vigorous game of polo.

With his hardworking mother now in her 80's, Prince Charles will reportedly take over the representative duties for the Cartier International. Richard Kay from the Daily Mail writes: 'For the first time, Prince Charles will take the place of his mother overseeing the Cartier International Polo at the Guards Club in Windsor on Sunday.'

Guards Club chief executive, Charles Stisted told Mr Kay: "She has passed on the mantle to the Prince of Wales and he will be taking over the role from now on."

I guess Charles is taking over the role now.

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Camilla told to halt spending

The Duchess of Cornwall has been told to reduce her wasteful ways. According to the Daily Express Weekend's Adam Helliker, the Duchess of Cornwall has been ordered to cancel her annual luxury cruise with female friends in favour of a more austere existance. Mr Helliker writes: 'The Duchess has bowed to pressure from aides at Clarence House that any photos of her on a jolly would be “unhelpful to the ongoing cause of promoting our image”. Those aides are particularly sensitive about unnecessary travel just when Prince Charles’s accounts have stated that he has reduced his carbon footprint by 18 per cent. The same report also revealed that Camilla undertook fewer engagements last year than before.'

After recycling her birthday suit (now there's a mental image you didn't need) from last year, it seems HRH Camilla is trying her hardest to cut back whereever she can. But is this a genuine move on her part to save royal finances in a show of sympathy for the plight of those who are suffering due to the credit crunch? A "royal source" tells the Express: “Camilla has been told that she has to be aware of the national mood at a time when the whole country is tightening its belt. It’s annoying for her because she particularly enjoys these breaks with her friends, not least because she has zero responsibilities to anyone while she’s on board, but she’s been convinced that her husband’s advisers know best.”

It seems that apart from the fact she can't go on holiday, the one thing that is bugging Camilla more is that she must instead spend time with her loving husband. The Express reports: 'This ban on Camilla is likely to be even more irritating for her because it effectively ties her to spending more time with Charles at a time when she is said to find it particularly difficult dealing with his “grumpy and irritable” temperament.'

Is this yet another example of a onff royal relationship?

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The funny thing about Princes William & Harry

Rumours abound that Princes William & Harry are to appear in comedic roles in the television special to celebrate Prince Charles' 60th birthday.

According to The Daily Express, ITV sources have confirmed that producers hope to record a few princely comedy segments. A source told The Express: “Everyone knows that William and Harry are keen for a laugh so we’re trying to line it up. We’re very hopeful. Charles and the public would love it.”

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Prince Charles' love letters for sale online

Before Autumn Kelly met Peter Phillips, another royal romanced a Canadian. The affair between Prince Charles and Montreal based Janet Jenkins was a well known 'royal secret' for many years. The couple met while Jenkins was working with the British Consulate in Montreal in 1975 and engaged in a passionate affair for over 20 years. Janet was to Camilla what Camilla was to Diana - a threat to the Wales marriage and a lover/confidante to Charles. Charles and Janet would meet in Britain and Canada and talk on the phone every few months in between.

Whilst Prince Charles married Diana, fell out of love with Diana and then recommenced his relationship with Camilla, he indulged in nights of passion with Janet, the last night occuring in 1992. Before that, according to various sources, Janet and Charles met one night in October 1983 for one of their familiar 'interludes'. Janet, who spoke to the Sunday Mirror, said: "We slipped back into the familiar intimacy that predated the marriage. Neither of us thought of using protection." Allegedly 9 months later (June 13, 1984 according to one online source) Janet gave birth to a son.

What this all tells us is that the relationship was a major part of Prince Charles' life and now the secret is slowly revealing itself. Everythingroyal.com is selling a series of very revealing letters written by Prince Charles to Janet Jenkins in 1976 when he was onboard HMS Bronington. Dated March 23, July 6 and September 12, 1976 the letters reveal a very touching side to the 2nd in line to the British throne. In the letters Prince Charles writes: "it was enjoyable seeing you & marvelous to find you in such good form- though the form might have been a little better!" " I only wish I hadn't had to rush off to catch a train & thereby ruin a gloriously cozy evening". "What a pity you can't see my ship - very different from an aircraft carrier and much less entertaining, and doesn't go to exciting places like Montreal where ladies live behind bushes in order to pounce on unsuspecting navel officers." "I do hope all is well in Montreal - are you ever going to be ready for the Olympics? I do hope there is something for my mama to open in July!" "much love, Charles". " I wish I could come roaring across the Atlantic to make you feel less lonely." "I do hope you will be there because it would be glorious to have a chance of being alone with you for a moment." "I can't wait to see you again hopefully during a good month!!!" "Much love and a big anti lonely "hug". "I have rung you but you were out! I shall try again soon. I was in Iceland sometime ago fishing & rang before I left since there is no telephones out there. " "Much love, as always from Charles".

Costing $7,500.00 each, the 3 letters are all written on official stationary but be quick if you'd like to buy the set. According to everythingroyal.com's website they're closing down.

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Kate Middleton speaks to the press..again!

Often lauded for her discreet nature, Kate Middleton has once again been caught out talking to the press. For the second time in a year the Daily Mail's Rebecca English has managed to wrangle a direct quote from the Princess in Waiting. Having obviously called the royal girlfriend whilst she holidays in Mustique, the Daily Mail reporter (or one of her underlings) quizzed Kate about whether she was having a good time. The Daily Mail said: 'Yesterday, asked on the phone if they were having a fun time, Miss Middleton replied "Yes" but she would not comment on the engagement rumours. She said: "I'm terribly sorry but I will not talk about that. I am truly sorry but please excuse me."'

Ok, it's not earth shattering stuff but it does disprove the theories that Kate refuses to talk to the press or keeps her composure by not responding to media reports. In 2007 before her split with Prince William, Kate was asked by the Daily Mail's Rebecca English to respond to the flurry of revelations regarding William's flirtations with other women. Kate responded with a terse "It means nothing," before telling Ms English that women will always throw themselves at William. This is not the first time a reporter has revealed they've got a direct line to Kate Middleton. The Express's Camilla Tominey also revealed how she called Kate. This begs the question. How do the loathed likes of the press get Middleton's phone number and why do they feel as though they're close enough to directly quote her, especially given the fact Kate is on holiday in another country?

This closely resembles the media relationship that another past royal girlfriend had with the press many moons ago.

Camilla Parker Bowles had a working relationship with The Sun's Stuart Higgins over a ten year period. Of course many speculated on where Mr Higgins was getting his very accurate accounts of the failing Wales marriage. Most considered the fact it was coming from a member within the Prince of Wales' circle and many were completely correct. But all accusations were met with denials both from the Prince of Wales's set and from Mr Higgins himself. It wasn't until years later that the former Sun reporter revealed the extent of his relationship with Camilla. At least once a week Camilla would give Stuart Higgins details of the goings on within Charles and Diana's marriage.

Respected royal author Sarah Bradford wrote about the Higgins/Camilla relationship: 'For years Camilla had secret --off-the-record telephone conversations with the editor of the Sun newspaper, Stuart Higgins - a curious relationship which illustrated the web of understanding and complicity in the circle around Charles. 'I didn't sense that she and the Prince were out of touch,' Higgins recalled. ' I talked to her once a week about Diana and Charles. She guided me on things that were not true or things that were off the beam.' He would run stories past her as a check and he could hear her, hand half- cupped over the receiver, repeating them to her husband. ' Guess what they're saying about us now, Andrew,' she would call out, and even the tabloid editor was astonished by their openness about her affair with Charles.'

Perhaps the idea of Kate Middleton also having rich working relationships with various tabloid journalists isn't that far fetched after all? Perhaps it's a case of history repeating itself and Prince William should be wary.

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